I'll always think about you on your birthday

It's been forever since I've posted. I blame blogger. Can't upload photos. Still can't comment on some blogs. Pretttttty tiring. So instead of the post I had originally started, I've had something else occupying my thoughts, and it would be nice to share pictures, but instead I'll share a story. 

I've mentioned my friend Keith. Keith who died in a dirt biking accident back in September 2009. He doesn't pop into my mind as often as he used to, but he's still there every once in awhile. I still wish he would hop on msn and tell me a stupid story. I still wish he was coming home to visit over the summer or over Christmas holidays. It stills feels so weird thinking that I'll never see him again. Never have him try to ruin my pictures. Never have to fight with him to smile for a picture. Never laugh at his jokes. 

It's his birthday today. He would be 24. 

To keep this short, I'm simply going to copy and paste something I wrote in my old journal. Just a simple 'this is what I did today' blurb, but it's the little things like those that you don't usually remember. This was the night of a random beach party. 

June 12, 2006

"Friday night we went to a beach party at the Gap. I was drunk. Had fun. Mosquitoes were bad so Keith told me he'd pay me 50 cents for every mosquito I killed and showed him. He didn't think I'd put much effort into it. I was up to $3.50 when he cut me off. He payed me later that night. I ran around all night in his Ravenwood hat."

I can't post photos of that night because A) it would take awhile to find them and B) blogger wouldn't let me upload them, but here's a previously posted photo of a different night. But I'm wearing his Ravenwood hat again. 

Miss you tons, you creepy old man. 

Recap: more travels, a year ago & fall TV

Tuesday, September 21

New Brunswick road trip

What was supposed to be a trip to NS for S. to get fitted for a dress, turned into a random roadtrip to NB with no real plans or destinations. We visited a couple of roadside attractions, went to the zoo, tried out Magnetic Hill (my 2nd time), visited the outdoor gym, hung out with A. for the first time in months!, went to Hopewell Rocks, had some awesome Arby's, and just had fun. Here are a few pictures. 

A. and me. Just a tiny bit windy. 

Me and my moose friend at the zoo

Pretty kitties

Otters were our favorite! 

Magnetic Hill

The Silver Fox

S. and me with penis rock at Hopewell Rocks

Thursday, September 23

It was my brother and sister's 19th birthday. They grow up so fast. 

I went out to a pub with mother and sister, where everyone drank wayy too much. We talked to lots of people, had some drinks bought for us, and made friends with the band, who stay at the hotel I work at. I was so excited when they dedicated a song to me. We talked to the guy a bit while the band was on break too. When I saw him at work the next day he even remembered mother and sister's names. 

Going out when you have to work the next morning is not a good idea though. Mom would agree with that as well. 

Friday, September 24

I felt horrible getting up for work, but I survived the day. My friend Scott was in town and stopped by to visit me at work on my last hour. When I was done we met up with B. and had supper together. The meal was great, especially being my first real meal of the day. 

Afterwards we did some quick video game and grocery shopping before Scott went home and I spent the night with B. 

He got me Playstation Move, which was hard to enjoy hungover, but still pretty cool. I was in bed nice and early that night, as we both had to work at 7:45 the next morning. 

Saturday, September 25

Thankfully, it was an easy day at work, since I was still pretty tired. But it was the last day before my sort of 3 day weekend. I was off at 4 and don't have to be back until Tuesday at 4. 

I met up with B. after work again and we played more PS Move. I rock at volleyball and table tennis, just sayin'. 

Later on we pooled our money together to get some BOGO McDonald's and some Haagen Dazs on sale. We tried vanilla almond a couple of nights ago (I LOVE it) and pralines and cream this time. He was a bigger fan of this stuff. Too bad it's regularly about $7 because I am in love. 

We watched American History X after getting back. Good, yet disturbing movie. 

Sunday, September 26

It's kind of a sad day today. It marks one year since Keith died. Although thinking about it doesn't hurt like it used to, I still miss the guy a lot. I miss our random MSN chats and taking pictures together and drinking the Captain. He really was one of the funniest people I've ever known. 

RIP Keith

On to happier things. 

I spent the morning with my love, and the afternoon with mother. 

We went to the farmer's market they were having downtown, a few cute gift/craft shops and Wal-Mart. The best place was Michael's, the craft store. I could spend millions in the store. Probably on scrapbooking supplies alone. There was so much I'd love to have. 

My favorite was the scrapbooking table and storage blocks like this one:

I would kill to have my own room just for crafts/scrapbooking. 

I also looked around the baking aisle. The materials available for making cakes is amazing. It's something else I would love to get into, but I can't afford to take on another hobby. 

I also spent some time on Good Reads today. I'm reading 'Smooth Talking Stranger' by Lisa Kleypas (bought in the Toronto Airport) and I'm really enjoying it. It makes me feel like I'm really getting back into reading. If anyone else is on Good Reads, friend me! 

One last random thought.. Desperate Housewives started tonight! I barely remember what was happening at the end of last season so I feel a bit out of it but I'm glad shows are starting back up again. I also have yet to watch Big Bang Theory's newest episode. It's waiting for me on the DVR for tomorrow. What are you guys watching this fall? 

Soon my bedtime. I'm hoping to get lots of tv and baking time tomorrow while everyone is at work. 

Hope you all had a great weekend! 

The Death of a Good Friend

I haven't had to go through the suffering of losing closed loved ones. I am one of those lucky people. My first experience with death was when my grandmother died of cancer. I was 6 years old. I got a little teary. I got a bit upset when I saw my mother and my aunts all crying at the funeral. I didn't really understand. That was the first funeral I ever attended.

The second funeral was my great-grandmother's. I felt so much like crying, but managed to hold it all in. I was sad, but not affected enough to openly cry.

I got a phone call around 11 a.m. on September 26, 2009. The first sign that something was up was simply that this friend of mine was calling. The second was his voice. That was when he told me our friend Keith had gotten into a motorcycle accident the night before. He didn't make it. I understood what he said, but my immediate response was "What?" forcing him to repeat it.

I spent the rest of the day looking through pictures of him, tearing up a lot, but never really crying. I think I went for days without crying.

Our whole group of friends made their way from even as far as Alberta to go to the funeral, which was held on a Saturday. We laughed so much just talking about him throughout that weekend.

He was always so much fun. He loved to drink, especially loved his Captain Morgan. He had the Captain tattooed on his arm. He loved joking around and picking on everyone. We exchanged hilarious stories about Keith, laughing so hard that we were crying. As the Friday night wore on, some of us simply cried.

It made me cry, but still made me happy when I hugged his mother at the wake and she told how much he loved picking on me. Even though I already knew it.

The funeral was hard. It's difficult losing a friend. It's very difficult seeing how much losing someone is hurting their family. It killed us all to see how upset his parents were.

The last time I saw him was December 2008, almost a year before he died. He was the same as always. I had to fight with him to smile for the camera. He only did it to bug me. Who knew it would be the last time.

For at least a month after the funeral, I thought of him daily. I don't think of him everyday now, but when I do, it kind of stops what I'm doing for a moment. It hurts knowing I'll never have him around to fight with to take a nice picture. To joke around with. To hear his crazy stories. To pick on the rest of our friends. But I'm incredible grateful that I can still think of him and smile, and even laugh. We had some great times.

He said he was my pimp and I was his ho.

This was in the middle of a fight where I was trying to get him to smile for a picture. Obviously I won.

It was his idea for us to take one of those family-style pictures where everyone is looking away from the camera. This was the first night we bonded over making fun of our mutual friends, sitting on lobster traps at a bonfire.